How can you prepare your kids for the antisemitism they will face? - comment

The antisemitic genie, now truly out of the bottle, is not going to go back in and the issues that arise are only going to become more acute and intense as time goes on. 

 THE WRITER visits her alma mater, Leeds University, where life for Jewish students is becoming increasingly difficult.  (photo credit: JEFF SAMUELS)
THE WRITER visits her alma mater, Leeds University, where life for Jewish students is becoming increasingly difficult.
(photo credit: JEFF SAMUELS)

The Hamas atrocities of October 7 brought the IDF into sharp focus for the entire nation and Jews across the globe, as tens of thousands of reservists were called up, while those who were already in active service were mobilized for the difficult, dangerous, and crucial battle that lay ahead – Operation Swords of Iron. Israel was forever altered on that day when thousands were injured, hundreds were kidnapped into Gaza, and over 1,200 were murdered.

Tragically, the death toll arising from the ground operation continues to rise. We check the news with dread each hour, fervently hoping that it won’t contain announcements of more fallen soldiers.

And yet, despite our ongoing torment and heartbreak, which is far from over, I – and many others like me, who made aliyah when their children were younger, knowing that one day, they would be called upon to serve their country – don’t regret making Israel my home.

While it’s extremely tough to have a child in the army, especially at a time like this, my heart still goes out to all of my old friends in Britain, whose children are facing a battle of a different kind: antisemitism.

Antisemitism is spreading throughout the UK: Is anywhere safe?

The antisemitic genie, now truly out of the bottle, is not going to go back in and the issues that arise are only going to become more acute and intense as time goes on.

 Demonstrators protest in solidarity with Palestinians in Gaza, amid the ongoing conflict between Israel and the Palestinian Islamist group Hamas, in London, Britain, October 28, 2023. (credit: REUTERS/Susannah Ireland)
Demonstrators protest in solidarity with Palestinians in Gaza, amid the ongoing conflict between Israel and the Palestinian Islamist group Hamas, in London, Britain, October 28, 2023. (credit: REUTERS/Susannah Ireland)

It seems to me that one of the difficulties for my British contemporaries, which I don’t face, is what advice to give to their children when dealing with such problems on a direct, personal, and immediate level.

The balance between encouraging your children to be proud of their Jewish identity, while remaining safe, is now something which all Jewish parents in the Diaspora must wrestle with.

For example, a friend in London, who prefers to remain anonymous, has recently faced such a dilemma. Her child lives in student accommodation on campus. One of his neighbors put up a Palestinian flag, which made him feel uncomfortable, nevertheless, he thought it would be a good idea to put up an Israeli flag in response. When he asked his mother for advice, she was torn.

What would your advice be? Keep your head down and don’t cause a scene, or go for it – be proud to support Israel – knowing that your child may be on the receiving end of verbal, or even physical abuse, as a result.

SIMILAR ISSUES will doubtless have to be addressed when considering which universities to apply to in the first place. In my day, it was easy. Although a couple of universities in Britain were not particularly “Jew-friendly,” back in the late ’80s, most welcomed Jewish students.


Stay updated with the latest news!

Subscribe to The Jerusalem Post Newsletter


Alarmingly, nowadays, some universities in Britain are considered off-limits for Jews, such is the level of antisemitism, not just among the students, but the staff too, who in some cases are even more of a threat. Even those institutions which had previously been safe havens for Jews in the past are less so now.

And then there are the problems that Jewish students face when actually applying for a place at university. In order to avoid potential discrimination, does one omit references to anything Jewish – and Israel? A gap year in Israel? Never happened. Summer spent volunteering on a kibbutz? Not me. You get the flavor.

Antisemitism, thinly veiled as anti-Israel sentiment, is something that has already begun to blight academic life in recent years. There have been instances where university professors, consumed by their singularly unhealthy obsession with the one Jewish state, have made life for their Jewish students extremely uncomfortable.

The very real problem for these students is that standing up for themselves and their beliefs in such circumstances could lead to poor grades and limit their job prospects. Knowing this, should they keep quiet to maximize their chances of success?

There have already been isolated examples of this, including one that hit the headlines from my alma mater, Leeds University. Can anyone in the current circumstances sensibly argue that these types of incidents will not grow in frequency? Further, does anyone really believe that this will remain restricted to universities and not spread into the workplace?

POTENTIAL EMPLOYERS present similar issues. Will parents feel compelled to advise their children to craft their CV carefully in order not to reveal anything that might stir antisemitic sentiment and result in rejection, whereas omission might produce the opposite result?

And having secured the job, what of the working atmosphere in the office or workplace? Of course, ultimately, it’s up to our children to make those decisions for themselves, but it’s hard for parents to have to watch them go through this.

We all control what personal information we give out when chatting with colleagues. In order to ensure a quiet life at work, do you conceal the fact that you are Jewish? If you’re going on holiday to Israel, should you mention it or simply lie and say you’re going to Spain, for example?

If, having decided that the course of least resistance is to keep schtum, what happens when the office banter is mocking Jewish victims of October 7 or replete with talk of Palestinian resistance? What then? Do you keep your head down? Do you join in?

Or is that the moment when you speak out and risk isolation in the office or even losing your job?

Even if there’s no office banter to contend with, what happens when you’re scrolling through social media to find the person who sits next to you has added “free Palestine” to their bio? Do you say something? Carry on going to Starbucks together? Or slowly detach yourself, hoping no questions are asked.

If you think this is fanciful, only this week, a Jewish journalist from The Guardian blew the whistle (anonymously) detailing all this and more.

Other troubling things have been related to me by friends in Britain since October 7: In Manchester, for example, a certain taxi firm has fallen out of favor with the Jewish community there, as the drivers are known to make their Jewish clients feel uncomfortable with antisemitic remarks.

Many have started to hide items that give away their identities, such as the Magen David (Star of David) necklace and kippa (skullcap) which is either removed or covered with a baseball cap when out of the house. Some have even gone to the lengths of removing their mezuzot from their front doors so passersby and delivery drivers won’t know that Jews live there. And of course, it won’t stop there.

It is difficult to see how these are mere temporary expedients until the current conflict comes to an end. The idea that this will all blow over is misguided. It’s here to stay. This is now the new normal in Britain and it’s only going to get worse.

Just as we fear for the safety of our young soldiers here in Israel, the fear among Jews in the Diaspora for the younger generation is very real too, due to the rise in antisemitism.

While the anxiety that goes hand in hand with living in Israel – namely, having children in the army – can be paralyzing at times, the fact that I, and more importantly, they, don’t have to hide the very essence of their being, their Jewishness, makes it easier to bear.

The writer is a former lawyer from Manchester, England. She now lives in Israel where she works at The Jerusalem Post