Working towards a solution: Israeli and Palestinian parents mourn together - opinion

We are dedicating the ceremony to children in war. Their only crime is being Palestinian or Israeli.

 Palestinians and Israelis attend a joint ceremony for families of Israeli and Palestinian victims on Israeli Memorial Day, organized by "Combatants for Peace" and the "Israeli-Palestinian Bereaved Families for Peace" in Tel Aviv on April 24, 2023. (photo credit: ITAI RON/FLASH90)
Palestinians and Israelis attend a joint ceremony for families of Israeli and Palestinian victims on Israeli Memorial Day, organized by "Combatants for Peace" and the "Israeli-Palestinian Bereaved Families for Peace" in Tel Aviv on April 24, 2023.
(photo credit: ITAI RON/FLASH90)

If I were to communicate with young students after watching what’s happening on the campuses all over America and in many places in Europe and the United Kingdom, I would stress that this is an opportunity for them to be part of the solution to a conflict that has been going on for far too long. The loss of life and the destruction of property is beyond belief.

These students now have the attention of all the media, so why not use it to really make change? Neither side will disappear no matter which side they take, so I would ask, “How can we end this madness?” My answer would be, “Instead of importing our conflict, why not export support for groups who are doing the work on the ground to end the destruction of war and recognize the humanity in the other?”

I belong to an organization of some seven hundred bereaved Palestinian and Israeli families who have all lost a loved one in the conflict. Every day we work for a nonviolent solution to end the war and the occupation. I joined the Parents Circle – Families Forum after my son David was killed by a Palestinian sniper. One Palestinian killed my son, not the whole Palestinian nation. 

I knew almost immediately that I wanted to stop other mothers and families from both sides from experiencing a pain that never goes away. How could I harness this incurable hole in my heart to prevent others from experiencing loss? How to get both sides to recognize that the pain of loss is the same, and the tears the same color? How to convince Israel that the occupation is killing the moral fiber of this country?

Watch a joint Palestinian and Israeli memorial ceremony

We are offering students around the world a unique opportunity to organize a screening online and watch a joint Palestinian and Israeli memorial ceremony on Sunday, June 12, at 8:30 p.m. Israel time. 

 Palestinians and Israelis attend a joint ceremony for families of Israeli and Palestinian victims on Israeli Memorial Day, organized by ''Combatants for Peace'' and the ''Israeli-Palestinian Bereaved Families for Peace'' in Tel Aviv on April 24, 2023. (credit: ITAI RON/FLASH90)
Palestinians and Israelis attend a joint ceremony for families of Israeli and Palestinian victims on Israeli Memorial Day, organized by ''Combatants for Peace'' and the ''Israeli-Palestinian Bereaved Families for Peace'' in Tel Aviv on April 24, 2023. (credit: ITAI RON/FLASH90)

Our extraordinary partner in this ceremony is Combatants for Peace. This organization is made up of former soldiers and Palestinian prisoners who have laid down their arms and are working every day for a peaceful end to the conflict. There is almost an element of miracle that both of these organizations are continuing to meet and make decisions together to create one of the most moving ceremonies you will ever be able to watch.

The ceremony is usually held in a park outside; last year, some 15,000 people attended and 300,000 watched online. This year is different: There is so much pain on both sides and so much loss, and also the fact that the Palestinians from the West Bank are living under closure since October 7, so we decided together to have it only online. 

We are dedicating the ceremony to children in war. Their only crime is being Palestinian or Israeli. People who lost their loved ones from the 7th of October, both Israeli and Palestinian, will tell their stories and speak out for an end to the war.

I would ask the students to imagine that they are part of our work, imagine telling the stories you heard on this night and exporting your understanding of the sanctity of human life, and understanding that just maybe, just maybe the telling of these stories will make the emotional breakthrough that could stop the violence.

We think that it is very important to know that Jewish and Muslim students have nothing to do with the decisions made by the government of Israel or Hamas, so perhaps it would be better to work together for a solution.

The writer is a bereaved mother and spokesperson for the Parents Circle-Families Forum.