In my previous column (Feb. 21), I wrote about the impact of the virtual world and the strain it puts on maintaining human relationships. In this article, I want to focus on younger children and teens’ relation to the cyber world.
How much time do kids spend on their cyber devices? The Joint Research Center of the European Commission (March 18, 2025) reports that since 2010, the average time spent by children between ages nine to 15 on screens and social media has more than doubled, to around three hours per day.
Over 80% of young people in Europe use social media networks daily. Other findings in the United States report an even higher number of hours, ranging from five hours daily in children ages eight to 12, and seven to eight hours daily among teenagers from 13 to 18.
A Finnish study posted on the American website ScienceDaily (March 10, 2025) found that children who spent more time on screens – especially mobile devices – were more likely to experience higher levels of stress and depressive symptoms and addiction in adolescence, and a reduced ability to learn important communication and social skills with actual people.
These findings, as discussed in The Journal of the American Medical Association (2025), have led experts to suggest that the leisure screen time of children and adolescents should be limited to two hours or less per day.
It is my belief that parents and teachers can play a vital role in attending to the risk factors associated with too much computer and social media time in children’s lives. Below, I list several recommendations for parents and educators that can help teach kids responsible social media habits.
Understanding social media’s pros and cons
The conversation about safe social media begins with an open dialogue about its benefits and drawbacks. While social media enables global connections, creative expression, and easy access to information, it also has pitfalls like misinformation, cyberbullying, and unrealistic portrayals of life. Encouraging children to see social media as a tool rather than a definitive reality helps set the foundation for balanced use.
Protecting privacy and personal information
One of the most crucial aspects of safe social media practices is protecting one’s privacy. Discussing privacy settings on platforms and the risks of sharing sensitive content publicly or with strangers can empower children to make informed decisions. Remind them that once something is shared on line, it becomes challenging to erase it completely.
Setting boundaries and time limits
Establishing boundaries around social media use is critical in preventing dependency. Parents can work with their children to create a schedule that balances online and offline activities. Setting time limits for social media use and prioritizing screen-free time for family, hobbies, and outdoor activities helps children maintain a well-rounded lifestyle.
Encouraging authentic relationships
Parents can guide their children to value authentic, in-person relationships over virtual ones. I often ask parents of younger children how often they read books to them, play a game, or participate in an outdoor sport together. These activities foster not only shared fun but also open up great opportunities for communication.
One father told me that whenever he played basketball with his 11-year-old son, he would have great conversations about how things were going during the game and the breaks. Parents should encourage participation in non-cyber social activities, clubs, or sports to foster genuine real people bonds and a sense of belonging.
Cultivating critical thinking
Teaching children to think critically about the content they consume and share on social media is essential. The important issue is for kids to understand that just because something appears on TikTok or other social platforms, it doesn’t mean it is accurate. Teaching your children to develop a healthy skepticism ensures that they are not easily swayed by external influences.
Modeling healthy social media habits
Children often emulate their parents’ behavior, making it essential for parents to model healthy social media habits. Demonstrating mindful use, such as avoiding excessive scrolling, and engaging in meaningful interactions and maintaining a balance between online and offline life sets a positive example for children to follow.
Providing alternative avenues for advice and support
Parents should encourage children to seek advice and support from trusted adults, mentors, or professionals rather than relying solely on social media. Building a strong family bond and being approachable ensures that children feel comfortable discussing their concerns at home. Additionally, parents can introduce their children to resources like books, workshops, and counseling services to broaden their perspectives and problem-solving skills.
In conclusion, guiding children on safe social media practices is an ongoing process that requires communication, education, and empathy. By fostering awareness, setting boundaries, and emphasizing the value of authentic relationships, parents can help their children navigate the digital world responsibly.
The writer is a cognitive-behavioral adult and couples psychotherapist, with a sub-specialty in treating anxiety, adjustment, and depressive disorders. He sees clients in Ra’anana and at his Jerusalem clinic. drmikegropper@gmail.com; facebook.com/drmikegropper