Writer Douglas Altabef had me with his article titled, “Playing with Fire,” in The Jerusalem Post last Tuesday. In it, he cogently made the case that each of us is guilty of creating an atmosphere of hate against the other, and of using vitriol to fuel the fire. It is impossible to argue against the super-charged environment of nasty words, which has become so prevalent in our beloved Israel.
In recent days, the angry and divisive rhetoric which has been spewed by both politicians, among others, only serves to inflame sentiments, and pit one group against the other. Such was the case when television presenter, Galit Gutman, while recently discussing the State’s budget, said, “How much of a burden can be placed on a third of this country to keep all these ultra-Orthodox people who suck our blood?”
Although she has subsequently apologized for that statement, she is not the only one who has pointed to the need for this sector of society to be financed by those who work.
So, while the ramping up of harsh words and the inability of two opposing sides to come together continues, Altabef attempts to offer, not only a justification for why the haredim make the choices they do, but also commends them for the virtue of that better choice.
Sadly, that is where he lost me, by saying, “many haredim willingly opt for a life of material poverty, if not outright privation, in order to live Torah-filled and oriented lives.”
Years ago, when teaching advanced English in middle-school to my native-English speaking students, I had them read an article titled, “Confessions of a Yeshiva Student,” which actually contradicts Altabef’s premise that the haredim choose that kind of life.
This was the account of one young man, who took the pseudonym of Yehoshua. Brave enough to reveal the truth behind yeshiva student stipends, he wrote, “We yeshiva students barely study. The state gives us funds, so why should anyone work? The seculars’ money is ruining our society.”
He went on to explain that once Israel had been established, everyone served in the army, except for the haredim, who neither wanted to get killed, nor be part of the secular society. Consequently, they refused to enter the system, continuing to study from morning till evening. Since that time, the state has funded them.
Yehoshua also explained that, while this may have been acceptable centuries ago when the rare, exceptional prodigy existed, the way it has evolved into becoming the only alternative for haredi young men, is no longer tenable. Speaking as someone who has lived that kind of life, he related that many of today’s haredim neither have the ability to sit all day and study, nor do they care to.
Work, marriage and studies
ALTHOUGH MANY would like to work after getting married, at the young age of 21 or 22, they cannot. The reason is that they are expected to continue their studies. Not to do so would be a disgrace to their family as well as the family of their new wife.
Being different from the rest is not tolerated when you live in a closed community. So, Yehoshua revealed how many get around this conundrum. They arrive late at kollel (learning institutions), they drink a lot of coffee and then they leave early.
Rather than break the social norm, they, pretty much, go along with the ruse of studying. As he explained, there are no exams to pass, no credit points to earn and no supervision, so faking it is all too easy.
Although these students appear to be living the life that’s expected of them, as Yehoshua laments, many are frustrated and unfulfilled. He blames the state for that situation since they are the ones who are making it possible for each new generation to receive stipends in order to finance this lifestyle.
The solution he offered was for the state to reduce the stipends after a certain number of years of study, since he contends that many of these men do want to work.
But he said that haredi boys have almost no control over their lives. He says that many yeshiva students want to go out to work, but they are stuck because they will lose their assured income, the kollel pension and the property tax discount. So, he asks, why should anyone work?
As Yehoshua claims that it does the haredi society so much damage, he was asked why the haredi politicians push for it. His answer was because that is the way they gain control.
Altabef believes that those of us who are not haredim simply cannot understand the reasons why they opt for the lives they live, which keep them impoverished. Well, he may be right.
Many of us know little about this community, which has chosen to separate itself from the rest of Israeli society, but when one of their own comes out, albeit, anonymously for fear of repercussions, we should carefully listen to what he says.
The demonization, outlined by Douglas Altabef in his article, could probably be alleviated if an honest exchange took place between these two factions – the religious and the secular. But how can that happen when there is no honest exchange between the members of their own community, born out of a fear of not conforming to prescribed appearances, and the consequences of different lifestyle choices being made?
It’s easy to accept sincere and deeply held convictions by those whose values and desires are to perpetuate the continuity of their faith, their people and their traditions. The thing that is unacceptable, however, is forcing a life of poverty and deprivation upon those who want to work, want to expand their horizons but feel unable to do so because the price to pay would be too steep.
Having said all that, there is no room for vilification or verbal incitement toward any sector of the Israeli community, because it does nothing to heal the rift or bring about much needed solutions and compromises. All it does is to further tear down.
What is needed most, is for the haredi society, first and foremost, to engage in some self-examination. Thereafter, they should address those youth who want to take a decidedly different direction, and be open-minded enough to accept the fact that, even in their own community, people should be allowed to think and act differently within the framework of their faith. This could make way for more young haredim to enter the workforce and become less of a burden on their families and the state.
If this happens, perhaps, more secular Israelis would be supportive of the real Torah geniuses who want to study, because that is their passion. For the rest, however, it’s time to extend an olive branch of freedom of choice, so that they can reach their financial, cognitive and emotional potential which often comes by developing one’s gifts and talents, whatever those may be.
The writer is a former Jerusalem elementary and middle-school principal. She is also the author of Mistake-Proof Parenting, available on Amazon, based on the time-tested wisdom found in the Book of Proverbs.