Marking Remembrance Day in an increasingly complex Israel - editorial

So, the question we are all asking ourselves right is: How is it even possible to mark these days in a way that is meaningful, respectful, and appropriate? 

 Soldiers place flowers and flags on graves of fallen Israeli soldiers in Kiryat Shmona Military Cemetery, on May 12, 2024. (photo credit: AYAL MARGOLIN/FLASH90)
Soldiers place flowers and flags on graves of fallen Israeli soldiers in Kiryat Shmona Military Cemetery, on May 12, 2024.
(photo credit: AYAL MARGOLIN/FLASH90)

Remembrance Day and Independence Day could not have come at a worse time. Israel is over seven months into a war that is showing no signs of waning, with levels of tragedy and loss that we do not have the tools to comprehend or process; it feels like our world is falling apart.

And, even if it were not a time of war, if October 7 had never happened, let us recall that up until those first alerts went off to the patrol soldiers at southern bases early Saturday morning, our society was dealing with a sectorial battle threatening to tear it to shreds.

This battle was one that held an undercurrent of a slew of issues: judicial reform, haredi integration, high living costs, crime in the Arab sector, and no resolution in sight to the Palestinian conflict and the West Bank.

So, the question we are all asking ourselves right is: how is it even possible to mark these days in a way that is meaningful, respectful, and appropriate? 

It feels like there is no room for anything else, anything that is not the day-to-day survivalism of war.

 An Israeli soldier stands during a two-minute siren marking the annual Israeli Holocaust Remembrance Day, at an installation at the site of the Nova festival where party goers were killed and kidnapped during the October 7 attack by Hamas terrorists from Gaza, in Reim, southern Israel, May 6, 2024. (credit: AMMAR AWAD/REUTERS)
An Israeli soldier stands during a two-minute siren marking the annual Israeli Holocaust Remembrance Day, at an installation at the site of the Nova festival where party goers were killed and kidnapped during the October 7 attack by Hamas terrorists from Gaza, in Reim, southern Israel, May 6, 2024. (credit: AMMAR AWAD/REUTERS)

And yet, the calendar beckons, and the day must be marked. Criticism has been levied heavily at the government for not “reading the room,” for marking the day in a way that is too similar to how it has been marked in years past. 

The tragedy continues, as loved ones remain in Gaza

Also, for it not giving this year’s ongoing tragedy the space and silence it deserves, especially given that 132 hostages are still being held captive. 

In our Jewish traditions, we have a very well-oiled, rich, and comprehensive way to mark death. The beauty of it is that it combines personal and communal tragedy, making everybody mourn together and apart.

Any way to mark the days is valid, especially in how it will be different from previous years. It must be able to hold space for everyone’s feelings – and that requires a high level of sensitivity. Not everyone is going to mark it like you will, and not everyone is going to agree with you. And that is fine.

However, the one thing that makes this year so different, breaking the mold of tragedy and war, is the fact – still unfathomable – that 132 hostages are still being held in Hamas’s tunnels in subhuman conditions. 

This is not normal. It is absolute torture, and the families deserve every form of support we can give them until a deal is worked out.

Looking back to last year’s national days, words cannot really describe what being a part of this nation and a part of this faith has felt like. 

And yet... We owe it to our people and to our children – our future – to work on the issues that will shape the next 30 years of Israel: getting to the root of haredi separatism and working towards a respectful integrative solution that leaves both sides feeling honored; reaching some sort of resolution to the Israel-Palestinian conflict; wages and high cost of living; the list goes on.

The most pressing issue, however, is to break down and overcome the sectarianism that has divided Israeli society for at least the past 30 years.

In other words, if we do not succeed in doing that in a real and true way, then we will never know how to come together. We will struggle to work together, to coexist, even during times that are not existentially threatening, when it is not war time.That is no way to live. We must find a way to move forward, together. 

Our leaders owe us better and we owe it to ourselves. We need to plan for living in the normal times that fall between the wars.

 Let us use these days to mark the pain but also to formulate a promise to the next generation that we will get there.