At a time of monumental crisis such as this in which every extended family in Israel has been affected, voluntary groups with trained professionals are trying to ease the psychological trauma of adults, teens and young children; soldiers and their parents and spouses; and families whose loved ones have been murdered, taken captive or wounded.
It’s a formidable job, and there are not always effective answers, but they are trying. All agree that they have never had to cope with so many pleas for help. “It’s not just anxiety – it’s deathly fear,” said Irit Aloni, a clinical social worker and director of the clinical unit of NATAL, which for the last quarter century has been providing round-the-clock psychological assistance to victims of trauma caused by terrorism and war.
“We received an unprecedented 1,700 calls in the last 24 hours,” Aloni told The Jerusalem Post in an interview. “Our organization is a seismograph that reflects what is happening. It was not just the numbers but the content. Parents and other family members weren’t able to find their children who were at the rave party in the south and were desperate for information. NATAL’s helpline is 1-800-363-363. Please call.”
She shudders when she recalls the woman from Sderot who called her and whispered that terrorists were at her door. “She said she wasn’t afraid of the incessant rockets and missiles, but she was petrified by the idea of nearby terrorists. She was afraid that they would hear her. We were on the line for 40 minutes, but help finally came. Our talk gave her a feeling that she wasn’t alone in that nightmare
The 10-year-old son of another mother in a one-parent family saw an ad for NATAL on TV and called. “He said he was afraid for his mom. He said he couldn’t breathe. I advised that they do things together, play a game, bake a cake, talk. It made him feel better.”
The organization has 20 trained volunteers for each shift, plus two psychiatrists. If talk therapy is not enough, there are 120 therapists around the country who can get treatment such as such as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) or eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy (EMDR), whose cost for civilians is covered by the National Insurance Institute or for soldiers for a one-time payment of NIS 60.
Aloni urged children and teens to stop watching films of the terrible events on the social media. “It’s like poison to the soul. If they watch TV, it should be with parents who must explain events to them instead of them dealing with it alone. The adults have to give children positive feelings, say it will pass, that we protect each other, that the army is working hard. It provides relief.”
Dr. Uri Yitzkar, head of the mental health unit for children and youth at Ziv Medical Center in Safed, advised that children suffering from anxiety, fear and trauma and unable to sleep should be told that their feelings are natural. Speak to each child according to his age and level of understanding. What parents tell their children and the way they behave has a strong influence on children. Sit quietly with them, ask how they feel, give kids a lot, sit quietly with kids, give their feelings legitimacy and promote a feeling of security and control as much as you can.”
Sima Turgeman, an experienced social worker at the emergency call center of Ezer Mizion – the non-profit Israel Health Support Organization providing since 1979 an extensive range of medical and social support services to help Israel’s sick, disabled, elderly and underprivileged populations – told the Post that those affected by the terror should be told it’s normal. “Who among us is not afraid? Fear prepares us for coping with things, but if it affects function, people need help. If a child says for several days that he can’t sleep, it’s OK. The brain continues to process the event. It’s like digestion; it’s vital to process it close to event, quickly, because it if it isn’t done quickly, the experience is locked into the brain.” There are children who go back to bedwetting, feel nauseous, vomit, have headaches as a result of fear.
Talking about what they experienced is vital, because organizing the story helps reduce fear and anxiety, Turgeman continued. Help them tell the story in words suitable to their age. “Tell children that there are bad people who want to take our country from us. Terrorists got into settlements near the Gaza border and murdered some and captured others and took them to Gaza. Many were killed. But the army releasee most people whose homes were taken over. And we are strong and will recover.”
It isn’t effective to give too much information. “Young children pick up the fact that something terrible has happened, even if they give the impression that everything is usual,” Turgeman continued. Encourage affected teens to talk, help younger children, do volunteer work, activate all their senses, listen to music. As for adults, she and her colleagues always asked for details, where they live, what they do for a living, what scares them, what they underwent. Deep-breathing exercises can also help children and adults. This calms the brain, and the brain calms the body.” Give of yourself to others. Praying and studying Torah helps the religious.”
The organization has trained social workers and psychologists who undergo continual training events. Talk therapy is usually enough for many, but if they need more, they can get treatment from Ezer Mizion.
Fewer suicidal thoughts
David Koren, CEO of ERAN – Emotional First Aid – told the Post that the organization’s 350 trained volunteers have never had a day like the last 24 hours. “We received 4,000 calls about uncertainty, reserve soldiers called to duty, rocket attacks, wounds, and deaths.” Interestingly, there have been fewer calls about suicidal thoughts because of the feeling that we are all together. He wasn’t sure that the current thoughts and acts of unity will erase and halt the division and even hate on the last 10 months since the government decided on a judicial overhaul. “It’s a matter of national leadership. They must make changes.”
Naomi Adler-Maymon, a psychologist at Jerusalem’s Shaare Zedek Medical Center who heads its psychological trauma clinic, said that unless other organization that give advice over the phone, hers meet people face to face between 8 am and 6 pm. They opened the clinic after the Meron tragedy in April 2021 in which 45 adults and children were crushed to death and over 150 injured.
“We listen to them about their experience, and it helps to process the event. They can be referred later for CBT or EMDR therapy or to a psychiatrist for medications.”
The Israel Center for the Treatment of Psychotrauma (Metiv), headed by clinical psychologist and founding director Prof. Danny Brom, called together his 30-member professional staff on Sunday to discuss initiatives for the next few months. “We have had a tremendous overflow of calls for help. One is parents and their interaction with their children of all ages. “You can’t keep secrets, even from young children. They saw on TV a mother and child about to be kidnapped to Gaza, and the child asked if the terrorists were going to kill them. The mother shrugged and said: ‘I don’t know.’ This is very frightening.”
Adolescents are sitting with their smartphones and watching horrific videos. “Just saying don’t watch them isn’t enough, because this triggers a flow of adrenalin,” Brom said. “They should be helped to be involved in positive actions, like taking care of small children whose fathers have been called up into reserve duty. Being together with people suffering from anxiety and fear should be called once a day, or visited. Don’t leave them alone.”
The center is also starting to give supervision to therapists in other organizations, not all of whom have undergone suitable training. Brom noted that after the end of the Yom Kippur, “the names of thousands of soldiers killed in battle were announced on the radio and TV over the course of weeks. In the current tragedy, it will take less time, but it will be no less traumatic and depressing. From next week to the middle of December, we plan to run 18 Peace of Mind groups for treatment-resistant post-traumatic-stress disorder.